T'was the morning after Christmas

Twas the morning after Christmas

And all through the store,

Some employees barely awake,

We were here at four

The people who don't work retail

Were all snug in their beds

With visions of turkeys, puddings and presents

Going round in their heads.

Admin are here and the prices have gone down,

Some think “thank god” and rush into town,

The store's so quiet with hardly anyone in it,

Do you think Justin would notice if we were to just bin it.

Christmas comes down to get ready for Easter,
It makes New Year sales that little bit sweeter,

The bakers are here putting their buns in the oven,

Before the mad rush happens all of a sudden.

We were closed for one day but people still panic,

They come in for fruit and veg hoping it's still organic

The checkout cashiers have all manned their battle stations,

Coffee's your friend when you're in it for the duration.

The day started slowly for those who were awake,

Our sanity was missing and we started to ache,

And then as one they started to awaken,

Seduced by cheap bargains and a craving for bacon,

They reached in their pocket for a wallet or a purse,

And raced back to seasonal all trying to be first.

Half price decorations, gifts and wrap,
 All we would like is one little nap,
It's been a busy time for those in retail,
As soon as it's finish we'll all hit the ale,

Our journey is over it's time for goodbye,

Working in retail doesn't time fly?

'Talent' or 'Talent-less' shows

Talent shows. They've been on our screen for decades. First 'major' talent show being Pop Idol way back in 2001. After this brings numerous other series, such as 'Popstars', 'Fame Academy' and more recently 'The X Factor' and 'The Voice'.


Nobody can deny the fact that these tv series arn't worth the money invested. These shows have produced more and more big selling artists, and quite a few of these British acts have 'Broken' America. Just to name a few the likes of Leona Lewis, Will Young, JLS, One Direction and Olly Murs have all had albums and singles at the top of the charts and around the world. They go round the country and other countries in massive sell out tours all becasue they were found on a tv show.


Everyone has heard of The Spice Girls, and Take That. These bands were both formed by an advert in a local newspaper. The format was similar to that of The X Factor, contestants auditioned in front of judges and were whittled down until the band was formed. The only difference being this wasn't broadcast on nation television, and nobody had to pick up the phone and vote. These 2 bands dominated the global charts for years and Take That are still going strong. On the talent shows, artists seem to only last a year or so. I mean who here still hears music from Gareth Gates, Steve Brookstein or Niki Evans. . But to quote 'quality not quantity', this cannot be more true. These reality winners have it all made for them, songs are written for them, the choreography is already there, and most dont play their own instruments. Nowadays, their voice is even put through a synthesizer which matches your voice up to the correct chords, making your song 'pitch perfect'. With all this going on, it seems that all the conglomorete record companies are after, is money. It seems as though, they choose anyone, throw them in a studio with a song already written for them, and release it. They then go back on the same talent show a year after to try and sell their debut album. I do think though that sometimes a big stage like this is all someone needs.


Britains Got Talent is probably my favourite of these shows. It is all about variety, and at the end of it you're not contracted to a record label where you cannot make any decisions on your own. You get to perform at the Royal Variety, and also some money. It is the perfect platform for people who believe they have got a certain talent, and just need the exposure to get where they want to be, without record companies telling you which song to release next, and which cities you're touring.



So tell me what is wrong about the old fashioned way of putting an advert in the papers to find genuine real talent? Or is there such a thing these days?

Tibits - A Review

National Vegetarian week is upon us (20th - 26th May) and I have been a non meat eater for around 15 years. Not once have I been to a 100% vegetarian restaurant and for my first I thought I'd go to the finest.

I went to a place called Tibits, ideally located just off Regent Street in London. Tibits has been at this location for nearly 5 years, and originated from Switzerland. I don’t associate the Swiss with veggie food, just cheese and chocolate. But then, perhaps that is their idea of veggie food. The owner of the Tibits chain is also the owner of Hiltl, the worlds oldest vegetarian restaurant dating back to 1898. This small chain consists of a ground-breaking concept, where as the focal point is a 'food boat' containing around 40 hot and cold dishes from around the world. Customers can create their own ideal menu from a selection of dishes, and can choose to eat in or take away. The food is then weighed, so the customer is in complete control of how much food they pay for, bringing alive the quote 'you get what you pay for'. At any other 'buffet' type restauant, it is so very easy to over-inuldge and basically eat until you feel sick, as it has already been paid for. I really like the idea of plating up your food then it being weighed, that way you are less inclined to cram as much as you can onto the plate, thus saving you some money, and some room for that desert.

This large restaurant is on two levels, ground and lower ground. There is flock wallpaper and velour seat covers in greens and deep pinks but it's certainly not hippyish or overly 'vegetarian'; it's a calm, chilled environment with a relaxed vibe. There is outdoor seating in a courtyard dubbed ‘the Regent Street Food Quarter’, and several punters were just treating it as a bar. It’s less pretentious than its neighbours and perhaps that’s what draws in the crowds – the place was buzzing on a midweek afternoon. A warm and friendly welcome greeted us as we were explained the concept and taken to our table. Now whenever I eat out, the vegetarian option is always something around mushrooms or eggs, and I dislike both. Luckily for me, Tibits are a tad more imaginative than that. The food looked really fresh, not like it was a Pizza Hut buffet from the day before. The dishes have Asian, Indian and Mediterranean influences and it's all about offering healthy food: "Food that loves you back" is their slogan. The dishes are being monitored all the time and I saw a chef constantly changing and replenishing the options during my visit. He obviously had high standards and was always checking and wiping up any spillages.


If eating vegetarian generally feels more virtuous than enjoyable, you need to pay a visit to this Heddon Street restaurant. The name tibits may not be that enticing but frankly who cares when the rest of the offering is. The food is fresh and the dishes so diverse that you’ll be hard pressed to ever get bored with the selection, the drinks are reasonably priced and the surroundings stylish. Better yet, you’ll never be hurried off your table because someone else has booked it for a later sitting and there’s no service charge to pay. In fact, all things considered, Tibits may well be the perfect credit crunch restaurant.

Youth and Politics... Does it Work?

So, today, the UK's only female, and longest serving Prime Minister (of 11 years) has died after a stroke. Often referred to as 'The Iron Lady' or 'Thatcher the milk snatcher', she made a difference to our country, whether people choose to believe it was for the better or for worse. A lot of people disagreed with much of what she did and she will always remain a controversial figure. But they can disagree but should greatly respect her political achievements and her own personal strength

 Among the millions of text messages, Facebook statuses and Tweets, there are numerous people who don't even know who she is, and more worryingly, most of them come from our own country. Some say she is like Marmite, you either hate her or love her, and scrolling through the Twitter search feed this appears to be true. Everyone will be talking about her, debating about her and as shown on line recently, arguing their opinions about her. Just like when Michael Jackson died, his music sales soared, and the same with Amy Winehouse. Now she has passed, more and more people will want to know about her, and the people who currently don't know anything apart from her name, will want to find out what the fuss is about. Here starts all the news programmes, TV documentaries  and books about her life, looking back at her time in Parliament, and what she has done for our country.

Journalists have been said to be 'searching online' for people who have said 'Who is Thatcher', just so they can write a story about the 'ignorant youth of today'. For years now people under 20 have been labelled as lazy jobless yobs who are just out to cause trouble. Evidence from the London Riots in 2011 seem to agree, but this is not necessarily true. Today, there are more people than ever involved in politics. Ok so there are a lot of people who don't know who Margaret Thatcher is, but there are people who don't know who Lord Nelson is, or George Washington. Even some older people still don't know who these people are. This is purely down to education, in most schools, history is taught around an hour a week, until you choose to study it  in year 9 for a GCSE subject, which is only about 20 people per year. In these lessons, not a lot is taught about the people of Britain, more so about the major events surrounding the people, such as the world wars. They learn about what happened, but not why and who was involved.

The youth of today seem to be more passionate about politics than politicians themselves. There's an ongoing debate about whether or not younger people should be involved in politics at all. Too often they are labelled as lazy and yobs. Recently, there has been an ever growing 'Youth Parliament', who get together at the House of Commons and debate real issues which range from gay marriage to transport and the environment. Politicians, and journalists seem to assume these days that the youth of today don't care about politics, or the state of the economy, but evidence suggests different. Nearly a quarter of a million youths voted for the 5 topics which were to be debated at the House of Commons  in front of MPs. One youth MP is quoted to have said 'Young people can start to gain a reputation for a positive mark on their community instead of the often false accusation that we are ‘trouble makers’. People often say ‘young people are the future so we must listen to their views’ but young people are ready to make a difference now'. Seems like more than ever young people are wanting to get involved in politics, and have been inspired by the way Margaret Thatcher stood by what she thought was right, unlike the recent Prime Minsters who just seem to be making u-turns every few weeks.

Margaret Thatcher has died, and those 'celebrating' her death should be ashamed. If it wasn't for her, this country would have a much different stance in the world. RIP Margaret Thatcher.

Stories of a Supermarket

Working in a supermarket isn’t just about stacking shelves, nor is it about making items go beep through a till. For the thousands and thousands of people who do so, it is more than that.
A job in a supermarket for many, is just a job. They come in, do their work and leave. For others, it turns into their career and acts as a stepping stone. I honestly believe that most people who end up working in a supermarket are there because they just needed a job. As with every job, you need to have a laugh with your colleagues. For one it makes the day go quicker, but also if you do work in a supermarket, its hard not to have a giggle at many of the weirdos that pass through its doors on a daily basis.

I have been at this supermarket for five years now, and it still amazes me what people want from me, and how people treat retail workers.

Working on the fresh produce department. Fruit and Veg flown from all over the world to this one location. The heart of the store and right at the front too. In this day and age, people expect far too much. They want top quality products, the reddest of tomatoes, the curviest of bananas and the roundest of melons. In England, people like to moan. I mean really moan. I don’t think I’ve ever done more than ten minutes on the shop floor without hearing ‘oh these peppers aren’t big enough ‘ , or ‘these carrots are massive’. Some people actually believe that I’m the one who grew the stuff, one woman said to me ‘these grapes look lovely today, think you picked them at just the right time’ and gave me a pat on the back. Spending around 40 hours a week in the same place for three years, you get to know it. Just like you get to know your home, the streets around it and whose car belongs to which neighbour. So for me, just like many others it can be very frustrating when customers think they know what you sell. For instance, an elderly man comes up to me, very polite at first and asks where the fresh Jerusalem Artichokes are. I say to him in a nothing but a friendly manner that we don’t sell them and offer him the tinned variety. ‘Oh’ he said, ‘I got them here last week’. I politely tell the man that its a line we haven’t ever sold. ‘Oh well you probably don’t know much then do you’ , I say to the man politely that I’ve worked on the department for three years and not once have we sold the product he is looking for. ‘I think you’re wrong’ he says, ‘i definitely bought them here last week’. So at this moment I’m feeling like someone has sky plussed me and has rewound, as I find myself telling the man for the fourth time that it isn’t a line we have sold. He gets louder telling me I dint know my job, this would be the millionth time Ive wanted to smack a customer in the face today but I remain calm and tell him he must of bought them from another supermarket. He yells at me stating he doesn’t shop at other supermarkets, demands that I show him where the product is, and then , like a light bulb has just been switched on says to me ‘ahh I remember I got them from Waitrose, I’ll be off then’ , walks out of the shop without an apology or even a hint of shame.

A lot used to frustrate me on this department. One main pet hate of mine was those small clear bags people use to put their fruit and veg into. I can see the use of them if you’re buying about 10 apples, or a handful of tomatoes. But when I see people reach up , pull out a chunk of bags, rip one off and put inside just one large potato then mutter to themselves, ‘this supermarket needs to go green’ it really does take the biscuit.

Working in the coffee shop. Where most people come to have that milky brew and relax after purchasing their box of cereal and a packet of custard creams. Being in the coffee shop, a small place within the store with about 10 tables, you get to know the regulars. You even hear their life stories as they ask you for a frothy cappochino with skimmed milk and a couple of sugars. Now I’m the sorta person who will just talk without thinking. An elderly man walks up to the counter. Asks me for a tea so I grab a teapot and put some hot water in it. I took his money and I asked if he wanted a pot of milk. For some unknown reason I say to the poor bugger ‘do you want a semi or a whole?’ , obviously meaning semi skimmed or whole milk. Me realising what I had said struggled so so hard to hold back on the laughter. He looks at me with a weird smile and said out of the corner of his mouth ‘ I’ll have a semi please’. Hadn’t laughed that much at work until this man walked away, my colleague was literally on the floor and this poor man, well, he walked off with not just a semi in his cup of tea..

Working in the customer service desk. At the front of the store. Where 99% of angry people tend to wander towards. The other 1% just chatter to themselves as they leave. The main department seeing as every single person who enters the store uses it. Now all supermarkets and most customer serving companies are measured secretly on customer service, this is why nearly 100% of the time, no matter what is said to you and in what tone, you still have to be as polite as you can whilst grinning like you’re on speed. The less than 1% of the time is when it’s allowed to be rude, and say what you feel. This rarely happens, but it does, and only happens when customers are so rude and obnoxious and clearly aren’t measuring you on your service skills, they’re just irate because they were overcharged by a matter of pence, or because they’ll have to go without their favourite packet of biscuits for a few days. People bring back things for refunds, which is understandable. Some you accept, and some you have to refuse, wether it being a branded item with no reciept or they just picked up the wrong flavour of Walkers. But when a gentleman is infront of you, showing you pictures of his dead dog to prove he doesn’t need the dog food anymore, you really can’t refuse can you?

Working in such an inclosed environment, it’s like being inside a pressure cooker about to blow. Relationships tend to happen, flings happen, and apparantly so do a gay man getting a woman pregnant. And yes this was about me. Me and one of my colleagues were quite close, we didn’t have ‘a thing’ or anything like that, we attended a works Christmas prty and after a few days the whole store thought we were together and she was having my baby. Rumours spread like wildfire, and 99% of the time they are untrue. But there is however, that 1% chance that whatever secret you are hiding, whoever you have slept with in the workplace, eventually everybody will find out. I’ve learnt that the hard way.

Retail workers get treated like dirt and get spoken to as if they are utter scum. Sometimes things are out of your control, such as a national bank just halting all transactions due to a securtiy breach, therefore causing utter mayhem for about 10 minutes. Workers in supermarkets get blamed for everything. I got blamed for the Volcanic Ash distruption back in 2010, apparantly it was my fault that a volcano in a different country had erupted causing flights to be cancelled, therefore us unable to get any supplies of fuit or veg in.

So there you have it, if you work in retail, be expected to be blamed for everything, and I mean everything. So pin your ears back, stick on that fake smile and just get on with your day.


© copyright 2012-10-22 21:16:57 UTC - All Rights Reserved

Keep Running...

I had the dream again. The one that wakes me up most nights.
I keep seeing you there, in front of me. You give me that same smile, the same one you gave me the very first time we saw each other, the first time our eyes met. The smile that carried my heart away . You're speaking to me, but I cant hear the words. Only the roaring of the wind fills my ears.
Then you turn and you start to run, You look over our shoulder as if to say 'follow me'. So I do. I began to run. I run as fast as I can, faster and faster trying to catch you. But you get further and further away with every footstep. I just cant keep up with you. You become a vanishing point in the distance, an impossible stretch that I want to bridge, that I would give anything and everything to cross. But you're gone.You've left me behind and now I’ve lost you.
In the dream, I collapse onto my knees fists pounding into the ground, cursing myself for not trying harder to stay with you. I can feel it building inside of me,  pain, loss, regret and shame. I tilt my head back as my soul gathers all my frustration and sorrow together and I let out a howl. But no sound issues. Only a completely and silent scream. Tears streaming down my eyes, the silence continues from deep within me , until at long lost, I can stop, exhausted.
And then I awake. Darkness. The sorrow takes hold of my heart and the tears that I had shed in the dream world find their way into the real world.
So in the daylight I run, I push myself to be faster, stronger in the hope that in the night , when I dream again, I can keep pace with you. I can follow you. By day I try, by night I fail. And I dread the night that you don’t appear, you don’t smile. Because then I know you will be far gone, that I could never hope of catching up with you ever again. I have just got to keep running.

I keep telling myself that I'm stronger, and all the effort I put in to running through the streets, along the river and through the countryside, all this effort will make its way into my dream.. it needs to if I want to have hope that I can someday catch you...

Sometimes I have good dreams, good dreams where I feel like I'm getting closer to catching you up. Then sometimes I have bad dreams, bad dreams where nothing happens and all my anger and all my frustration leap out of my body and unleash themselves into the real world. This is what I was afraid would happen... but I still keep telling myself that I have got to keep running....

I keep thinking about you. Who are you? Will I ever catch up with you? Why do I dream about you night after night? Every morning you're the first thing I think of , and I think of you before I fall asleep. But I think about you for the wrong reason, the very reason why I push and push myself to catch up with you. I want to know what happens if I ever do catch up with you. It seems like I'm in love with you as I cannot stop thinking about you, but you're just a part of my imagination, or are you?
I don't recognise you, so surely you are someone my mind had made up, someone who I want to be with. For months now, I have dreamt about you. For months, I train myself during the day, to hopefully catch you and finally find out why this has been happening. But I can't. In the dream world I stop running even though I know I can do so for miles, but it's you. You get further and further away without gaining speed. You still smile at me, the same smile all those months ago. You seem to like the chase, you like having someone so desperately want to catch up with you that it makes you feel powerful. But one day, I'll give up. Give up pushing myself, give up wanting to catch up with you because in every dream I do, I fail and it will get boring. But not now, I can't stop dreaming about that smile, and it's going to kill me not knowing why you're there.


© copyright 2012-10-22 21:16:57 UTC - All Rights Reserved

Addicted To Society

Society. One small word, but means an awful lot. The society we are growing up in, is false. Everything it stands for is fake. Young girls thinking they need boob jobs and botox to get anywhere in life, by auto-tuning every single song that is released and by having every single model in a magazine or a fashion show under a size 10. People need to be confident and they need to be confident in the way they look.

When I was in the last year of primary school, I didn't eat a lot. I was stick thin, and I remember my mum pritty much every day telling me I need to be eating more otherwise I'd end up in hospital. I think this carried on into high school and by the time the second year came I was overweight. I couldn't stop eating, I was buying crisps and chocolate in the morning before school, and buying a cone of chips after school every day, and then having my tea later on. I didn't care what I looked like, not sure why. I was being called fat all the time and that really damaged my confidence. In those days, you wernt really tought about healthy eating, there wasn't a Jamie Oliver there doing away with school dinners. I was fat throughtout school and into college, I had had enough.

I didn't try losing weight the old fashioned way by cutting down what I eat, Instead, I went online. I searched for things like 'lose weight fast' and 'get slim in a week' , I had read articles online about how people had took some pills and they were 'skinny' in a matter of months. I searched and I came across a website with one of those 'new members' offer. So I fell for it, I bought a months worth just to see if they work. After this, I bought what were called 'Slimming patches' , 'designed to give your metabolism a boost' the advert said. So, I fell for that too. After a few months I had realised that I was actually gaining weight, so I buy more and more. Looking back I gained weight cause I was eating more, thinking Im losing weight, but this was obviously wrong.

I dont know how, but I managed to kick the addiction. I moved away and after a couple of years lost just under 6 stone. Only just at the stage of regaining my confidence. I dont care what I look like, but it's horrible when you're young and you sometimes hated who you were. Its things like this when I really feel for the young people growing up today, so much pressure to be 'perfect' or 'normal' , but the way I see it, is there even a 'normal'?

Twas The Night Of Valentines

Twas the night of Valentines, and all through the house. My phone wasn't ringing and I'm wanting to go out. It can be a movie, a play or a place to eat. I just don't wana stay in, watching numerous repeats. My friends all have dates and I say I don't care. But I'm hoping some lovin' will soon be here I'm lonely, bored and just don't know what to do I can't stay in all night, just me and my Playstation 2.

  I go on GooglePlay and download an app find a date for tonight as easy as that. My phones now ringing, wonder who it could be A lady who claims to be called Stephanie A chick from the internet with no pic on her page A sexy voice though, and seems within legal age Says she knows what a man really really wants she says she has a nice arse, and big at her fdont. I guess I shant be leaving now at all Time to prepare for a Valentines booty call.

A shower is taken, I Febreeze the home, Hide any evidence I don't live alone A car then pulls up and parks on my drive My dog so scared he runs off to hide. As it nears to my door, a purse in her hand I pray it's Beyonce, but kinda looks like a man

She steps in with her top showing more than I need to see She stank of cheesy Wotsists , I say oh why me With cards and chocolates and bottles of wine with messages saying oh please be mine We sat on the couch but I wana be rude by kicking her out to go chase some other dude I edge away from her and turn on the tv She whispers in my ear 'make love to me' She piles on top of me, I think I've met my maker If there's any Beyonce in this chick, this broad must have ate her I throw her off as she reaches for my belt Run around screaming won't somebody help.

With a crash my cousin slams open the door He shouts 'get out you silly little whore' , I've finally managed to control the beast we toss her outside and into the street As her car drives off and out of my sight I say to myself I should have had an early night Cupid is the devil and definately no hunk Well the night is still young , time to grt drunk.

'Twas the month after Christmas

'Twas the month after Christmas,
when all through the house,
nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse!

The cookies I'd nibbled,
 the chocolate I'd taste,
at the holiday parties
had gone to my waist.

I remember the marvellous
meals all prepared,
 the gravies and sauces,
 and the beef "nicely rared".

The wine and the stuffing balls
the bread and the cheese,
and the way I NEVER said,
"No, thank you, please."

So - away with the last
 of the sour cream dip.
 Get rid of the fruit cake,
every nibble and chip!

Every last bit of food
that I like must be banished,
  until all of the additional
"ounces" have vanished!

I won't have a Galaxy,
 not even a lick!
I'll want only to chew,
on a celery stick!

I won't have Dominoes,
 or cheesecake or pie,
 I'll munch on a carrot,
and quietly cry.

I'm hungry...
I'm lonesome.
.. and life is a bore!
But isn't that what January is for?